Each and every year I take photographs. There are photographs each and every year that I take and can’t believe that I actually took.
This year I have two photographs. It is of the same subject. And during the same session.
The cool thing about the session was that I just wanted to shoot. I just wanted to photograph a friend. I just was interested in the subject. I didn’t get too many moments like that last year. This year was interesting joggling the business and creativity of photography. It was hard. Just hard. I never knew how hard it was without going through it. I’m glad that I did. Business is hard as shit. It really is. Not many people can do it. I am still figuring out if I can do it myself, we shall see.
Back to the images. Rob had a couple of ideas about the shoot. He showed me a couple of images of Bob Marley and I knew that I wanted to do some images of my own also. So, Rob came in. Alittle nervous and didn’t know what to expect, so my wife gave him a cocktail and he got comfortable instantly.
The thing about the photo shoot was that it was super cool and easy. I wasn’t thinking about camera settings or lighting much. I was just taking photographs. I was connecting with Rob by talking and seeing what he was going through. He didn’t say much. He was just there and being the subject.
The first photograph was taken in my make shift office-studio. We were playing around with different types of faces and expressions with cigarette smoke. Rob’s face was priceless. I didn’t ask him what he was thinking, but you wonder what he was thinking when he was taking the photograph. It stops me in my tracks and cool that I was a part of it.
The second photograph was a complete accident. I had my light meter and was testing the light to get a consistent exposure. But I turned Rob to one side that was actually close to the light. I looked at the image on the camera and instantly said “fuck.” I wanted to delete the image, but didn’t because I went on to compose and “expose” the photograph the next photographs.
That image was one that I have constantly think about because i was married to the photograph being technically correct and the photo became instantly more interesting. This photograph spoke to me. I know this is crazy saying it, but it tells me every single time that I have to get back to the basics. I have to tell the story of the way I feel, not by the proper settings of the camera, that I am getting to the route of the photography, which is the creativity.
The photographs wouldn’t have come alive if I didn’t take them to my editing program and played. I allowed myself to play and explore and to try things differently. I love the enjoyment of it all and how I tried something different on the top 40 photographs of this series.
I wonder what will be my favorite photograph of next year. I wonder if I will be satisfied with my photography. I wonder if I will enjoy the process from start to finish, not just to click of the shutter of my photography projects. I wonder if I will get bored and wonder what the fuck I’m doing. I wonder if I can create meaningful work where people can actually talk about and change in their lives. I just wonder where all of this is going and how I can make it work for myself.
I guess I will see. I will see and just explore. I will be the person more of who I want to be and will express myself in that manner as real and vivid in whichever way that may be. We shall see.