I don’t know where to begin. Sometimes it is hard to write about people you admire and letting them know so. I have known Ben most of my life. Our mothers are best friends and all 6 boys were always around each other as we were growing up (him and I, Ben’s brother, and my 3 brothers). We drifted a part in college; I went to the big state school, he went to the local university. We formed an untouchable basketball duo that was called, Hot Brothers, nobody could beat us if both of us were playing on the same team. We did some crazy shit I can’t even mention on the blog, because one, people wouldn’t believe it, and two, it will surely get me in trouble or frowned upon (I’ll just say we were curious kids). We even started a business together that almost dismantled the friendship altogether, but we learned from it and are better friends because of it.

The Ben I Know

Most of the things Ben and I talk about were business related, our futures, or what movie we were/are going to make. We also talk to each other about our girlfriends, and his year plus child who he constantly thinks about. We also talk to each other about our families, and when he is going to come home from working abroad. He is also the one who comments on my blog and gives me pointers, but more importantly, encouragement to continue my passion of letting the world know the true me. We joke around about many things and at times can remember something in our childhood and start laughing about it.

Ben is my best friend who cares for others around him, but will let you know when you are fucking up or need to have some sense to get it together.

All 6 of us were close when we were kids. Now we see or talk to each other a couple of times during a quarter, but Ben and I talk to each other almost every week, still being many many distance away.

Getting Paid, but in an Exciting, Scary, Sorta Way

Every time I think about his decision to go over seas to get paid big money, despite all of the negative tension and violence happening around him, I cringe and hear through his voice a determination and will to provide for his family and a life more than a 9-5 can ever provide. I don’t think I can put myself in the situation he has put himself in, because I cherish my life so much. That is something I admire and something I look for him to help me, in an indirect way.

Some Memorable Stories

I have many stories from Ben and my life that are flat out funny, but also a life lesson taught from every single one. I’ll give you 2 brief stories to give you an idea of the man I call a best friend.

It’s Business

We were right into the heart of the business we started 3 or so years ago, we made the stupidest decision to tell a nuckle-head about our idea before we registered the website url. This guy filled our naive heads with internet and business jargon. I was the one paying for all of this, Ben kept talking about market research and how the world hadn’t seen what we were trying to do. I think we even made t-shirts, and hired a web designer that couldn’t meet all of our expectations. I think I was on the verge of quitting the business. I know for sure I was ready to get rid of the 3rd member of the group, because he wasn’t providing anything to the organization, and the asshole didn’t like blogs and, all the web 2.0 stuff that was taking off at the time. He had a couple of corky mannerism that Ben and I made fun of whenever we had a meeting. But, long story short, we got rid of the guy, he kept our website, and it essentially broke up the business soon after.

Throughout this whole experience Ben kept a positive attitude, even a strikingly anger focused determination to kick the 3rd business partner of the business ass after what he had done. I don’t know if Ben was in denial of what we were doing, but he believed and still believes that the idea is something that is possible,profitable, and more relevant now. We didn’t have the right people around us to make things happen, but we kept going through everything as if we could do all parts of the business.

You Can’t Be Either…

When Ben and I were kids we would joke about race and whatever was on our mind. I don’t know how the conversation came up, but we were talking about American Presidents. He mentioned, with a smirk, then a laugh, on his face, that I couldn’t be president here, since I wasn’t born in the country. I told him if I wanted to I can be president of Nigeria. He kept joking with me and said, “YOU CAN’T EITHER”.

Ben laughed, then  he wanted to hit me, and I knew I won the conversation from then and until nearly half a year ago. Ben and I have repeated this same story to friends and people we come across. I still laugh about how we were being real with each other from the very beginning of the friendship. And now, that we are all sorta grown up, we are still being honest and impactful in each other’s life.

So, this appreciation goes out to Ben, I know it has long been over due, for me to write how you have touched my life and continue to do so. I appreciate your fierce determination to live a better life for yourself and family, and how you want to give back that very mission in life to people all around you and far away. I appreciate the memories we forged together and how we can laugh and learn from a failed business, and still be deeply honest with each other. I appreciate you also pushing me to trust myself and the will to do better in my life.

Thanks Ben, thanks for having some part in shaping my life!

P.S. I would love to spend a whole saturday watching old cartoons, playing Nintendo, and playing a couple of days of basketball again! (It’s still possible)